Feel.

As I was walking to the bus today, I noticed how cold it was. I had 44 degree winds blowing in my face, so I took the opportunity to put my scarf and my gloves on; You know, bundle up a bit. As I was walking towards the bus stop, a leaf fell to the ground. Not just fell, it danced. It swirled as if it wanted some notice that its time was up on the tree, and it lay down peacefully on the ground. The cold wind continued to breeze across my pale face while I took a big breath in, waiting for the "J" bus and putting up with the warm fuses from the other buses going by. It was relaxing in a way, because that was the only thing warm that went by as I was standing there for 15 minutes. Buses never seem to be exactly on time. At least from my experience. Just the silence of chatter, the looking and waiting, seemed all too realistic, and curiousness peaked my interest. Why were the people more quiet than usual? My assumption was that they were trying in their own little way to keep warm. Is it easier to stay warm when you aren't talking? I always figured that if you were talking and moving, you would stay warmer longer. All who were waiting for the same bus that I was were very quiet, standing in their little corners, similar to me. I wonder now if we were all just a bunch of introverts waiting for the same bus to arrive. It's possible. It's also impossible to have too much personal space when the bus is crowded to its full extent. You kind of have to go outside of your comfort zone for that one.

In other news, work went alright. I am getting tired easier. I am doing patients, but I feel like the mechanical woman. I don't feel any engagement like I used to. Maybe it's just my tiredness this week that's getting to me. I go through the motions, communicate professionally and kindly to the patients, perform the tests, and then I'm done. Don't ask me to remember any names, because even if I wanted to, I couldn't. Once in a while, I will remember that one patient who puts things into perspective, and has a positive attitude about his/her life, that really opens my eyes to how much strength in character there can be in a single human spirit. Even though this person can't walk and will never be able to, for this person to give me some uplifting comments is a miracle in itself. I believe we all have that capability; To look at a bad situation and find something good about it. It can't all be bad. There's something good in all life's little suprises.