Jon and Ki Sun

Thank you both for being there when I needed a shoulder to cry on. It meant a lot to me. I love you both.

One part of my life ended last night

Semaj and I broke up. My friend Jon Bell came over to help console me after this and Ki Sun was soon to follow. I had cried most of the evening, and want nothing more than to be happy. It is not good to be in a relationship if he doesn't have the same feelings toward me that I have for the him. I think for the most part, it was a mutual break up. I told him what I wanted, and he called me back to let me know that he couldn't give it to me. Others think he should have told me sooner. Some think that he was a great guy for not telling me because Semaj could see how much I loved him every time he looked at me. I made a strong effort but I cannot make someone love me the way I want to be loved.

I can now find what I really want and take the time I need to do it. Yes, I already have feelings for another, but this happened after the break up. I will take my time that I need to grieve over a love that's lost. It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. I love very deep and very hard when I give my heart to someone. Hopefully this person will be the one that will treasure the love that I give him. I believe he will.

Regardless, I shall take my time. Time heals all wounds, although, there will still be the scar that the wound left. That shall serve as a reminder that I have loved so much and I still can love, and will love. Have a good day all. I will be contemplating over much I need to think about.

Why is it so?

I am sick ......for the umpteenth time this year. I wonder why. Well Semaj was sick for a week and both weekends, and I certainly can understand that. I had to leave work early because I could not think and I got achy and light headed. I'm nauseated and lethargic, but I will be fine. I feel like I will be okay tomorrow. Anyway, all, have a good day. Monday is over and only 4 more days to go. Not for me. It's 5. I work on Saturday :p