What does sleep mean?

I am up at the oddiest hour of the night listening to Ki Sun cough up phlegm and watching television about UFO's. Typical night I'd say, except too late for me to even function appropriately.

Funny thing is that I usually call Jon to put me to sleep when I feel like this, but he is not picking up his phone. Makes sense. He's tired and sleeping like he should. Not me.

The biggest realization I have had through the journey of my mind (I went through some very difficult times in my relationship as a result of my depression)is that the way my mind thinks is not necessarily who I am. The stress and emotional drama that I put myself through is not me. It is important to get regulation and stability; to be able to shut the noises off in my head and realize that I am under all of that background noise to realize that I have a mind of my own; a logical mind that is comforting, positive and accepting.

The mind is a powerful thing. It's keeping me up right now because of Ki Sun's coughing and because I worry. I need to stop worrying, go to sleep, and get up tomorrow. I'll most likely be so tired I can't move, but I'll be going to work regardless. I have until December before I can use sick days. I'm not anxiously awaiting to use sick days, but I like to know I have a buffer if I do get sick. It's nice.

The realization of this world comes individually. Not one person can just get it. It is a variety of thoughts and experiences that make us realize that there is more to this world than just our thoughts and our perceptions; there is the actual reality of this world, and our perceptions of it can make or break it.